Isn't It Romantic?

What is romance?  What makes a moment romantic?  How do you capture an intangible quality, such as romance, and create a night to remember?

To play upon a phrase, we may not know exactly what romance is, but we certainly know it when we feel it.

Beyond the aura of magic and intimacy ... to me, romance is all about elevating a moment with someone to make it special.  It can be anything from a meaningful gaze laced with promises, to a weekend getaway at a honeymoon resort.

Sure, you can make a gourmet dinner and scatter rose petals all over the bedroom, but something doesn't have to be elaborate to be romantic.  It just needs to be thoughtful and directed toward that one special person in your life.

It's about the special touches that someone doesn't have to do, but did just for you.  It's about setting a scene that makes someone else feel like the only person in the world to you.

Most of all, romance has to be for romance's sake alone.  While a romantic evening may end in the expected manner, the moment itself is the goal.  These moments are what create a bond between people, and a safe space for sharing with each other.

When I was a very young girl, a heart box full of chocolates was the very definition of true romance.  The fancier the box, the better.  Being gifted with one at school by a certain someone was the epitome of Valentine's Day ... anything less was a huge disappointment.  The girl clutching the biggest, fanciest box was the envy of her entire class.  (Yes, some years it would have been better not to go to school that day!)

Life was much simpler then, and a box of candy was all it took to send our hearts soaring.

But for us grownups, romance can be a little more complicated.  We're busy with work and kids, appointments and commitments and obligations.  There is little time for romance, certainly no time to plan anything romantic.

But what if it was as simple as lighting a candle at the dinner table?  Even at a table surrounded with children, lighting a candle and tossing your mate a flirtatious smile helps to kindle an intimate moment between you, while listening to the kids recount their day.

Here are a few other ideas, some simple, some a little more elaborate, to bring a little romance into your life:

• Take dance lessons and go out dancing.  What more enjoyable way to keep active than to take a few twirls around a dance floor?  If that's just not feasible, then play your wedding song and take a twirl across the kitchen.  Reminding each other of your first dance as a married couple is sure to kindle romance.

• If you are a singer or musician, write your mate a love song.  Nothing is more romantic than having a song written for you.

• Write a love letter or a poem.

• Write out a found poem or love song on a piece of parchment or bordered paper, frame it, and give it to your mate because it reminds you of him/her.

• Make a hand-made St. Valentine's Day card to give to your love ... even if it's not Valentine's Day!

• Create a playlist of love songs and play it whenever you're alone together in the evening, or when driving together in the car.  Having a special playlist of love songs that mean something to the both of you creates the soundtrack of your relationship.

• Mark important dates ... wedding anniversary, anniversary of the day you first met, birthdays, and Valentine's Day ... with a big, red heart on a wall calendar.  We all want our significant others to remember on their own, but give them a break and mark the day so that it's more about celebrating and less of a test of their memory.

• Give flowers.  The majority of women (and lots of men) love flowers.  Something lovely in your home is always appreciated.

• Buy her a flower every day until she has an entire bouquet.  There is something very romantic about being given a single flower, such as a single rose ... and when one arrives daily for 12 days, it will bring a smile to her face as she anticipates the next one.

• Place a flower under the window wiper of his car in the morning before he leaves for work.

• Leave a lipstick imprint of your lips on the bathroom mirror.

• Cook your mate their favorite meal.

• Make their favorite dessert.

• Buy some massage oil and try it out.

• Share a bubble bath.

• Spend all day in bed together.

• Hire a limousine for a special evening out.

• Go away together to a romantic spot for the weekend, even if it's just a nearby hotel, to get away from it all!

• Buy her a heart locket.  This old-fashioned piece of jewelry, photo-ready, makes a charming and treasured addition to any woman's jewelry box.

• Hold hands.

• Go for a walk.

• Watch a sunset together.

• Spend nights outside on the porch or patio watching shooting stars and talking.

• Pack a picnic lunch and surprise your love at work with it.  You can enjoy it there, or go to a nearby park to share.

• Go row a boat with your mate on a pond in the middle of your city park.

• Make a toast to each other while drinking champagne, even if it happens to be at a work event or fundraiser.  Stealing a moment to honor each other, to dedicate a glass of bubbly to your significant other no matter where you are, is a romantic thing to do especially when unexpected.

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Enjoy previous seasonal blog posts:

Romantic Foods Something special ...	Romancing Your Life Setting the scene to fall in love with your own life
The Romance of Travel Falling in love with a new destination, adventure, and vistas	Baking is Love No one has to bake ... ever.  So when they do, love is there.
The Lenten Season A reminder that accepting the challenge of self-discipline is good for the soul	Spring Cleaning Tackling and taming the clutter
Travel Plans Planning some new scenery and sights for the New Year	Warming Up to Winter Introducing a new nightly ritual may improve the quality of your sleep and of your life!
A Fresh Start Healthful smoothies to begin the year off right!	Salty Sweets Finishing salts on your dessert
How It All Began The very beginnings of Afternoon Tea.	A Tale of Two Bread Puddings So different, yet both so good!
A Very Foodie Town It's almost time for Restaurant Week again!	Top Chef - Colorado A celebrity in the family!
Herb Harvest There's nothing like growing your own fresh herbs!	Fresh! Locally-grown farm-fresh products and produce are the best!
Cooking with Herbs Herbs are making a tasty appearance in some of your favorite desserts!	The Problem with Pesto ... It's so darned easy, you'll be making it all the time!
Do-Gooders! Ana's non-profit, Healing Warriors Program, gives away a state-of-the-art electric wheelchair!	Congrats, HWP! Healing Warriors Program received a huge honor, and we were invited to the Pentagon to see it!
Baking Cakes Basic baking tips for beautiful layer cakes	Donate if you can! Healing Warriors Program, my sister's nonprofit, does very important work for our service members' complete health and wellbeing.